Tea Drinking Etiquettes to Follow in Formal Tea Ceremonies

When you want to go to your first formal tea drinking ceremony, it is very stressful. I remember worrying about “what if I would do to offend someone” or show that I didn’t know anything about classy tea drinking etiquette. But when I went there, I realized that it was simpler than I thought. No matter what country you are in, from Japan to China to England or Morocco, the tea ceremony etiquette is one thing: showing respect. You don’t have to be a tea guru. Knowing a few simple things and polite manners is all you need.

In this article, I’ll show you how to prepare for, attend, and behave in a classy tea drinking ceremony in very simple language so you can enjoy the ceremony with confidence and enjoy the experience.

How to Prepare for a Tea Drinking Ceremony?

Preparing yourself before the ceremony is your first sign of respect, especially for attending English-style afternoon teas.

Clothing & Attire for Tea Drinking Ceremonies

Here are the most important things you should know when preparing for a tea ceremony:

Choose your attire wisely: Wear clothes that are clean, neat, and formal. Clothing that is too loose or sporty is not appropriate. Even clothing too formal isn’t suitable for most afternoon tea ceremonies, unless the dress code advises you to do so. Remember, you may be sitting on the floor, especially in Turkish or Iranian tea gatherings, so be mindful of your socks and shoes. Once I arrived at the door of a ceremony, wearing muddy shoes, I was embarrassed that I had to take them off!
Try to arrive sooner: this is necessary. Arrive at least 10 minutes sooner. Being late is not only disrespectful, but it also disrupts the flow of the entire event and ruins the mood of the host and other guests.
Don’t wear strong perfumes: the smell of tea is a pleasant part of the experience. If you wear a strong perfume, it will overshadow the tea aroma. To respect this sensory detail, avoid strong perfumes or do not wear perfume at all on the day of the ceremony. My trick is to spray my perfume on my attire 24 hours before attending the ceremony.

How to Behave When Entering The Ceremony?

The moment you enter the ceremony is your first impression. Keep your cool and be calm..

Greeting When Entering a Tea Drinking Ceremony

Let’s explore some tips about how to behave respectfully when entering the host’s house:

Greetings: Greet the host with a simple smile and brief eye contact. If the host bows or bows slightly, do the same. If they shake hands, shake them firmly and briefly. There’s no need to do anything fancy. This, of course, depends on the general greeting manners in your culture. For example, in Iran, we tend to hug when the host is a close friend or relative.
Wait to be told where to sit: Never sit in the first empty seat yourself. The guests’ seating is determined, especially in European tea ceremonies. Wait for the host to point to your seat.
Maintain silence and turn off the phone: Cut off unnecessary conversations as soon as the ceremony begins. Turn off your cell phone completely and put it away. Even the vibration mode is distracting. Your full presence is the best gift.

How to Handle Teaware & Utensils?

Handling teaware & utensils, like the teaspoon, the tea cup, or even the teapot, is difficult for beginners. But don’t worry, you will be successful at it.

Handling Teaware and Utensils in a Tea Drinking Ceremony

Follow my personal tips to look like a professional, classy tea drinker in ceremonies:

Don’t touch things unnecessarily: Treat cups, saucers, teapots, and other items like works of art in a museum. Only pick them up when they are given to you directly. Don’t hold them up to the light, inspect them, or keep them for your friend next to you. Show your admiration by looking at it and making a short compliment, such as, What a beautiful cup!
Be sure to hold the cup with both hands: When a cup of tea is offered to you, hold it with both hands. This is a sign of appreciation and full attention in Eastern cultures. Before drinking, watch other guests rotate the cup in their hands. If you forgot or didn’t know, it’s okay. The principle of holding with two hands is more important.
Eat the pastry properly: If pastry is served, you should eat it before tea to prepare your mouth for the taste of the tea. Try to eat biscuits or cookies in two or three bites. For cakes and other pastries, cut them in half with a knife and use a fork to take a small bite. Depending on the culture, you may need to leave or not leave small pieces on the plate as a sign of respect and appreciation.

The Art of Drinking Tea

This is not about spoons and forks. It’s all about patience and attention. Drinking tea isn’t a simple act, especially during a classy ceremony. The way you drink your tea shows what type of person you are. In many cultures, it is an indication of your social class.

But don’t worry. The following tips tell you how to drink your cup of tea in a classy and socially acceptable way:

Give thanks first: The moment you take the cup, be sure to thank the host with a short “thank you”.
Drink slowly and silently: Sip the tea slowly and savor it. Avoid making any slurping or whistling noises.
Golden rule: Never blow into the cup to cool the tea. This is considered offensive in many cultures. If the tea is hot, wait patiently for a few seconds.
Drink to the last drop: Try to finish all the tea. This shows that you enjoyed it and didn’t reject anything. Once you’re finished, look carefully into the cup and then respectfully put it back down.
Ask timely questions: If a question comes to mind during or after the ceremony, ask during a natural pause and in a calm voice. This shows that you’re interested.

Tea Drink Ceremony Do & Don’ts in a Nutshell

Do the followings:

Be patient: The pace of the ceremony is slow. Don’t rush and get along.
Pay close attention: Pay attention to the host, the decorations, the flowers, and of course, the taste of the tea.
End with a sincere thank you: After the ceremony, be sure to thank the host for their efforts face-to-face and with a smile.

Don’t do the followings:

Don’t preempt: Don’t drink tea, start talking, or make any moves before the host or senior guests.
Don’t criticize: Don’t criticize the taste of the tea, its temperature, its sweetness, or the way the ceremony is being conducted.
Be distracted: Don’t use your cell phone, jump into others’ discussions, or constantly look around.
Leave the ceremony abruptly: Don’t get up before the host clearly announces the end of the ceremony.

Conclusion

Attending a tea ceremony is more of an opportunity than a test. A chance to experience peace, learn respect, and see beauty in the simple details. If you follow the basic tips we mentioned, such as arriving early, being quiet, holding the cup with both hands, and drinking slowly, almost everything will go well.

The hosts are kind and will forgive you if you make even a small mistake. So let go of the stress, take a deep breath, and let this unique experience take over you.